Christmas & Chemo

First of all – Alice is doing ok. Her treatment on Friday has left her needing to rest a lot these past few days, but the nausea has been very minimal and she has slept well at night. 

This morning I sat down with the girls to think back on this past year and jot down a brief list of some of our highs and lows. Claire’s first contribution was a low: “Alice got cancer and had to be in the hospital”. But Alice’s first contribution was for the high category: “I got medicine to make me better.”

I loved hearing both Claire’s concern and love for her sister, but also Alice’s optimism and focus on the healing aspect of this past year. What a joy to my momma heart!

Our Christmas was so sweet. Yet another miracle in my mind – that we all got to be together at home this year. 

One of the many things that these past 5 months have brought is a feeling of urgency when it comes to celebrating. I’ve pulled down and used my Grandma’s china more times in the past 2 months than I have in the last 9 years of having it. And the fears of “what if my girls break a plate?” have been replaced with “it’s a plate… let’s enjoy it and be careful with it, but if it breaks… it’s only a plate.” We’ve celebrated all sorts of things over the past few months – using pie, and tea cups, and china plates to add to the festivities. 

So for Christmas Eve and then again on Christmas morning we hosted my parents, Rob’s parents, my Grandpa and one of my Uncles. We used cloth napkins, and real plates covered with delicious food. We told corny jokes that some of us found hilarious. We opened presents and delighted in the girls. We gave thanks for God’s many blessings. And in the midst of the prep work and the clean up, we rejoiced in the gifts of family, and celebrations, and memories, and the fact that every one of those things are given to us by God – not because we deserve them, but because of His incredible love for us. And the more I realize that “good” things are not owed to me – but are individually chosen, hand crafted gifts bestowed to me by God, the more thankful I am for even the “common” every day things that I get to enjoy. 

We wrapped up the week with a Thursday afternoon bike ride/run/walk around the neighborhood. Alice leading the way. It was such a simple activity, and yet it was so emotional for me. That our child with cancer was riding her bike with a smile on her face. What a gift!

The next morning we took her to the clinic where we stayed for about 5 hours. By the time we got home she was wiped and was asleep for the night by 5:30. I am hoping she rests as much as she can this week. It’s her last week being 4. This Saturday is her 5th birthday! You can imagine the many hopes and dreams I have for her and for our family this coming year!

I hope you had a Merry Christmas – and I pray that 2019 is full of joy and unexpected blessings for you! 
love, m