God of All Comfort

I have tried several times to write an update that accurately shares the amazing ways God has been caring for us… but the post ends up being ridiculously long and I don’t think people have the time or interest to wade through all of it. 

Instead here is a very brief summary… we’ve had specialists call us themselves (not their assistant etc.), arrange to meet with us on their day off, postpone trips so they can stay in town and treat our girl. Yes, we’ve had “bad news” in the form of THE pathologist specialist in Chicago (who even the specialists in Houston use) revising her diagnosis… BUT the fact that she took a second look at Alice’s slide at all is a miracle. Yes, we got “bad news” that her tumor tested positive for a rare genetic marker… BUT we now see that as God’s way of overriding the human error that missed the focal anaplasia (twice) and making sure that our Drs know her cancer is aggressive and needs additional treatment to make it go away for good.

Yes, she now has to have a 3rd chemo drug… but she tolerated it amazingly well this past weekend! 

Yes, she now has to have radiation… but it’s a very low dose and only for 6 days. 

This past weekend I felt really down about this whole situation… I finally started to experience the anger side of grief. I walked past a woman wearing a scarf over her bald head in the store and had to walk out because I couldn’t stop the tears… I don’t want to have a child with cancer. I don’t want to spend my days with Drs., administering medications, treating side effects, fearing every germ that might enter our house, researching how to talk to my four year old about losing her hair, waking up at every slight noise at night assuming it’s Alice getting sick, having to miss my Uncle’s funeral this past weekend, having to miss my soon to be sister-in-laws bachelorette weekend, feeling guilty when I lose my patience with my sick child, feeling not enough when I need a break…  

But, I also read these verses this weekend… and have started to counter my anger, and fears by praying for joy:

James 1:2-4 Count it all joy, my brothers,[b] when you meet trials of various kinds,3 for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.4 And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.

So many of you have been comforting us because you’ve already walked through trials like this… and you received comfort from Jesus, and are now sharing that with us. So too, one day we will be able to share comfort with others who will walk through trials like this – and offer them the same steadfastness, the same comfort, the same love we are learning to walk in today. Will you pray for joy for us – even in the hardest of these days?

A couple other prayer requests:
– Radiation will be over the next couple weeks, but we don’t have the exact days yet – please pray for Alice to tolerate it well
– At the end of this month my brother is getting married in Oklahoma… will you please pray that Alice will be strong enough to travel for that! Her flower girl dress is hanging in her closet… and it would be such a joy for all of us if she can join Claire in that role on Oct. 27. 
– Please pray for our conversations regarding Alice’s hair… we don’t know exactly when it will start falling out significantly enough to warrant a new hair cut, but we are trying to talk about it now to make it as “normal” as possible for when that day comes. 

Thank you – we appreciate each of you and your prayers.
-Marissa