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Cancer Moms,  caregivers,  Encouragement,  God's Character,  grief,  lament,  Weary Hearts

Lament Series: Are We Allowed to Complain to God?

We teach our children not to whine and complain. We encourage them to be thankful and to look for the positives in their circumstances. So when we look at Biblical complaint in lament, it can feel uncomfortable.

Biblical complaint is different than whining. Whining is what we do when our preferences aren’t being met. Biblical complaint is when we are acknowledging the disconnect between the pain of our lived-in reality, and what we know is true of God’s character.

Biblical complaint invites us into uncomfortable territory. It gives us permission to struggle not just with our circumstances, but with God himself. Lament is a unique format that allows us to say, “God, you say you are close to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18, Isaiah 61:1), but I feel like you have abandoned me in my grief!”

This type of complaint is an honest cry of a suffering soul who knows it’s not supposed to be this way!

Lament is an opportunity to humbly bring our complaints and questions to the Lord. Just like with Turning, there needs to be a humbleness in our hearts. A belief (even if it’s not felt in the moment) that God really is good and really is in control.

Lament is holding God to his own word. Saying “God, you said this about yourself in Scripture, why aren’t I experiencing that truth in my suffering?”

God loves having his word held back up to him. It demonstrates our faith in who God has told us he is.

Take a look at some of the complaints in the Psalms:
Psalm 10:11 “He says in his heart, “God has forgotten, he has hidden his face, he will never see it.”

Psalm 22:14-15 “I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint; my heart is like wax; it is melted within my breast; my strength is dried up like a potsherd, and my tongue sticks to my jaws; you lay me in the dust of death.”

Psalm 77:7-9 ““Will the Lord spurn forever, and never again be favorable? Has his steadfast love forever ceased? Are his promises at an end for all time? Has God forgotten to be gracious? Has he in anger shut up his compassion?”

Some of these complaints feel borderline irreverent. Are we allowed to say these things to God, and about God?

The answer is yes. We are allowed to be this honest with him. Jesus himself quoted Psalm 22 on the cross. Asking why God the Father had forsaken him. The pain of what Jesus was experiencing didn’t APPEAR to match up with what he knew was true of who God is – so he cried out in Biblical complaint.

Suffering has a beautiful way of digging through the surface of piety and religious niceties. We are forced to acknowledge that our best dress wasn’t armor enough. Saying the “right” thing at Bible study doesn’t cure a sick child.

Lament allows us to bring the rawness of our humanity into the light of God’s love. Lament lifts the burden of righteousness off of our shoulders, and invites us to lay our burdens on the back of Christ. We are recognizing that we are weak, but God is strong. We can’t end suffering, but God can, and he will.

Reflection Questions:
1. What complaints or questions have you been hesitant to voice to God?
2. What has been holding you back from being completely honest with him?
3. Consider writing down your list of complaints, and then ask a friend (or this group!) to help you find Bible verses that speak truth over each painful thing.

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